Dating Tips (or How do I know I am ready for Marriage?)

Women and Men when they are dating often ask themselves if they are ready for marriage?” “How will I know if he or she is the one?” “What should I be looking for in my date?”

Here are a few tips to think over:

1)  Do I want to become married?  Does who I am seeing want to become married?  Does he or she believe in marriage as a sacrament and as an indissoluble bond?  Does he or she believe in marriage, not as something defined by the state, but rather as something divine, established and defined by God?  If not, don’t get married; even if you love each other. Marriage is not two people who happen to like each other and share the rent or hobbies.   Nothing says that you must marry a person you like or merely love.  Two people can like and love each other and exist perfectly well without getting married.

2) Is he or she kind and generous? Consider their specific ways.  Is he or she generous in their words and compliments.  Generous with their time? Generous with their space?  Generous with their money? Generous with their behavior toward you, family members and friends?

3) Is he or she respectful of a person’s dignity?  Defending and not compromising your own or another’s physical modesty, chastity and even their privacy.  Does he or she value other people, especially disabled persons, children and the elderly? Does he or she listen attentively to you and are not hurtful regarding matters of difference in opinions or feelings?

4)  Is he or she living in sanctity? That is, is he or she attempting to live holy lives?  Does he or she pressure you to co-habit or have sex without the bond and grace of being married? Does he or she like entertainment that is good and wholesome or is routinely vulgar? Does he or she drink excessively or use drugs? Does he or she attend and participate in the life of the church?  Does he or she pray? Do you pray together?

You are engaged in something much bigger than the two of you. The goal of marriage is for two people to become ONE.  A He and a She must become a We. An I and a You are to become an US.  Too frequently men and women stay living together, even after getting married as a man and a woman, when they should be becoming husband and wife. A man that does not want to become a husband, and a woman that does not want to become a wife are not becoming one, not living a COMMUNION with each other.

If you observe this while you date or during your engagement, in time  you will know if he or she is the one person meant for you to marry.