In our culture we are often encouraged to find ourselves before we marry and start a family. We are encouraged to travel and find what cultures we like; to find our career and have a good job; to find our spirituality; to find our sexual preferences; to find any number of things that will allow us to find ourselves so that we can then get married, settle down, and start a family.
Seems reasonable, no? Maybe even responsible?
Consider this then:
Man [whether male or female], who is the only creature on earth which God willed for itself, cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself. (From Gadium et Spes, 24, emphasis added.)